Husband and Mittens are sitting at the dinner table while I clear plates.
HUSBAND: “Baby, can you say titties?”
MITTENS: “Kitties!”
ME, to Husband: “Don’t tell Mitzi to say titties. What if she actually said titties?”
HUSBAND: “Then it’d be AWESOME. Baby, say titties…not kitties.”
MITTENS: “Kitties!”
ME: “Just stop.”
HUSBAND: “Baby, can you say penis?”
MITTENS: “Pee-nus.”
ME: “Stop, stop! We already know she can say that considering she thought it was Peter Pan’s name awhile back. Stop with the words.”
HUSBAND: “It’s fine. She doesn’t know what they mean.”
ME: “Still. Adults know what they mean.”
I drop a fork on the floor and it almost hits my foot.
ME: “Shit.”
MITTENS: “Shit!”
ME: “Shit.”
HUSBAND: “HA!”
